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“Speaking The Truth In Love Is Not Arrogant ”
Speaking The Truth In Love Is Not Arrogant
Douglas Hoff
By inspiration the Lord’s servant Paul wrote, “That we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive; But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ:” (Eph. 4:14-15). It is always important to teach the Gospel in a loving way since precious souls are at stake. The apostle also taught that “...the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth” (II Tim. 2:24,25). Christians should always strive to present the Gospel in a way that avoids unnecessary upset or controversy. The truth is divisive enough without adding a bad attitude on the part of Christ’s follower (Luke 12:51-53; John 10:19). Regrettably, some first century disciples preached Christ from envy and strife while others did so out of love (Phil. 1:15-17).
There are some who claim members of the Lord’s church are arrogant when they present the message of salvation. Is it possible for a Christian to state the truth of the Gospel in a haughty manner? Yes. However, declaring there is only one true church Jesus will save is not a mark of arrogance. It is stating the truth that will save souls (Eph. 1:22,23; 5:23). When people believe one church is as good as another, there is no incentive to seek the true church. Is it arrogant to say a person must be a faithful member of the church of Christ to be saved? No, that is the Gospel of Jesus Christ (II Thess. 1:8). There are many in denominational circles who affirm such a statement is the height of arrogance. What is exceedingly strange is that some who hold this view are members of the Lord’s church. The very people who ought to know the truth act as if they do not understand it. Maybe they have been deceived into mouthing this popular, though fallacious opinion. Perhaps an appeal to reason can rectify the situation (Isa. 1:18).
Defining terms can help resolve misunderstandings for those who are willing to investigate (Acts 17:11-13). The word arrogant means “making claims or pretensions to superior importance or rights....” Some synonyms for arrogant are presumptuous, haughty and proud. Antonyms of this word include meek, modest and humble. Arrogance is defined as “offensive display of superiority or self-importance; overbearing pride.”
Since proud is listed as a synonym for arrogant, let us consider its definition and then also see the shades of meaning among related terms. The word proud has two distinctly different connotations. One is a positive trait and means “feeling pleasure or satisfaction over something regarded as highly honorable or creditable to oneself.” For example, a father can be proud of his son’s achievements. The other connotation of proud is the negative sense which is condemned in the Bible as sinful. This definition means “having, proceeding from, or showing a high opinion of one’s own dignity, importance, or superiority.” The related words proud, arrogant and haughty reveal a belief in one’s superiority.
These three words are distinguished from each other as follows. Proud implies lofty self-respect. Arrogant applies to overbearing behavior which arises from an exaggerated belief in one’s importance. Haughty implies an often disdainful assumption of superiority over others.
God’s word condemns the negative sense of pride as well as arrogance and haughtiness. Consider a few verses from the Bible on this subject. “Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall” (Prov. 16:18). “Not a novice, lest being lifted up with pride he fall into the condemnation of the devil” (I Tim 3:6). “Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble” (James 4:6). “But now ye rejoice in your boastings: all such rejoicing is evil” (James 4:16).
The Bible plainly teaches Jesus never sinned (Heb. 4:15; I Peter 2:21,22; I John 3:5). Thus, he was never guilty of the sin of pride or arrogant boasting. Prophecy revealed the humble character of our king, “Tell ye the daughter of Sion, Behold, thy King cometh unto thee, meek, and sitting upon an ass, and a colt the foal of an ass” (Matt. 21:5). Our Lord said of himself, “Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls” (Matt. 11:29).
Since arrogance implies one is “making claims of superior importance,” was Jesus arrogant when he said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me” (John 14:6)? No. He was simply stating the exclusive truth, even though it offends many. As a spokesman for the Lord was Peter arrogant when he said, “Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved” (Acts 4:12)? No, though there are many who would accuse the apostle of being too narrow minded. Still, the Bible shows there is only one way to be saved and that is through Jesus Christ. Any other way is the way of eternal loss. This is not an arrogant claim of superior importance, it is God’s revealed truth.
Was Paul arrogant when he said, “There is one body, and one Spirit, even as ye are called in one hope of your calling; One Lord, one faith, one baptism” (Eph. 4:4,5)? Certainly not since it was the same writer who just ten verses later instructed Christians to speak the truth in love. Paul was not guilty of insolence when he pointed out the Gentiles were “alienated from the life of God” (Eph. 4:18). Instead, Paul was motivated by love for lost souls. He wanted the Gentiles to hear the Gospel that could save them (Rom. 11:13; I Tim. 2:7). Was Paul being arrogant saying Christians have salvation while the unconverted Gentiles did not? No. Read his words in Galatians 6:14,15 “But God forbid that I should glory, save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom the world is crucified unto me, and I unto the world. For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision availeth anything, nor uncircumcision, but a new creature.” Paul pointed out the Jew was no better than the Greek since all have sinned (Rom. 3:9,23).
What does it mean to speak the truth in love? Apparently, some have concluded it means never upsetting anyone. However, this is not in harmony with God’s word. Jesus said things that offended some who heard him. A good example of this are the hard words Jesus spoke to the Pharisees (Matt. 15:1-11). “Then came his disciples, and said unto him, Knowest thou that the Pharisees were offended, after they heard this saying” (Matt. 15:12)? Even some of Christ’s disciples got upset and no longer walked with Him because of His teaching (John 6:60,61,66).
Speaking the truth in love means following Jesus’ example. “For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments” (I John 5:3). We must love lost souls enough to confront them with their sin and doctrinal error just as our Lord did. The apostles had plenty of opposition from unbelieving Jews but Paul said, “I kept back nothing that was profitable unto you, but have shewed you, and have taught you publickly, and from house to house, For I have not shunned to declare unto you all the counsel of God” (Acts 20:20,27). Failing to declare all of God’s word to avoid controversy is not truly loving. It is cowardly.
Why might some contend it is arrogant to say there is only one true church? It is a common trait of the wicked to accuse the righteous. Ahab called Elijah the troubler of Israel when in fact it was the other way around (I Kings 18:17,18). One lost in sin usually does not want the light of truth exposing his dark deeds (John 3:19,20). Why did Cain murder Abel? “Because his works were evil and his brother’s righteous” (I John 3:12). Only those who love the truth will appreciate the courage and wisdom of another who will point out his sin (John 3:21; Prov. 9:8,9).
Accusing a person of being arrogant when he stands for the unique identity of the Lord’s church makes one a judge of the heart. Who alone can fairly and accurately judge a person’s heart? God can! “Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts: and then shall every man have praise of God” (I Cor. 4:5). See also Jeremiah 11:20; Acts 17:31 and II Timothy 4:8. Sadly, emotions and friendships rather than God’s word dictate some people’s actions (Matt. 10:37,38). We must not be silenced by those who insist it is arrogant to say there is only one true church and that one must be a faithful member of it to be saved.
